Potty Training: Day 3 (AKA: We’ll see about that!)

Posted by A Dose of Justice

“Hey mommy! I’m smiling at you in a super

cute way and I signed please.”

“Can I have some Fritos?” (…still smiling…)

“What? I have to go potty first? I mean

toilet. I forgot we were being super fancy

pantsy with more grown up with words.”

“When this timer thingy goes off, I’m

staying put. You’ll see.”

“Timer thingy just went dingy. Uhhh. I

wonder if mommy remembers.”

“Uh oh! Now my talking thingy is saying

Toilet, Toilet. Mommy heard that. I’m not

seeing a way out of this.”

“At least I get my iPad. Hey mommy.

How about some me time? Back away from

the toilet.”

“Okay. A little bit further.”

“That’s better.”

“Okay. So what if I went through a few

hundred underpants today. Girls aren’t the

only ones who get to change over and over again.”

My Day On Social Media

Posted by A Dose of Justice

Okay…..Let’s see what’s going on with the internet today.

What? Mommy and her friends are trying to be cool making duck-lip selfies. Old people are crazy!

I can do better.

How you like them duck-lips?

I just laughed so hard I farted.

“Here’s a list of things you may not know about me.”…..What kind of status is that? If people wanna know things they ask. Someone’s trying too hard.

Oh snap! Miley Cyrus bleached her eyebrows.

HAHAHA….. I’m gonna pee myself. I never knew a daddy ripping up newspaper was so hilarious.That baby is going bonkers.

Oh no she didn’t!

Now how do I make that smiley face thing? I just don’t understand how people make all those crazy symbols. I’m so behind with technology.

What? There’s an event I wasn’t invited to?

I see the pictures! You can’t deny it happened.

And…Why won’t you ever like my Facebook status???

I so hacked my sister’s account. This is gonna be awesome.

And…..

I’m defriending you and you and you….well…I’m blocking you.

Hmmmmm. I might have to rethink my political allegiance.

She’s fixing THAT for dinner??!! YUCK!” I don’t believe for five seconds her kids liked it like she said. Maybe the doggie did.

Today was not my day. (Day: 37)

Posted by A Dose of Justice

I went to school today, but that was the easy part. I mean how bad is a muffin in the morning and a turkey cheese sandwich for lunch. Not too bad. I worked on a turkey feather collage and played with cars and scooters at gym time. BUT….The time after school was the rough stuff.

First of all…..my wife came home with me. Enough said on that.

My artistic vision was lost today. I couldn’t figure out what to doodle on my doodle pad. It was sad and made me feel poopy. Oh where, oh where did my muse go?

Then I couldn’t decide what to wear, so I went to my mommy’s closet. What was I even thinking? Her clothes don’t fit me. Plus….I have better taste.

I did find this questionable high heel shoe in her closet. It looked like Minnie Mouse’s shoe on steroids. On the upside, I found something to use as a hammer.

And finally…..I was clueless about putting my pajamas on. It’s not like riding a bike. It’s not. Okay….Maybe it is. I don’t know how to do that either. Not yet.

I just want to go to bed.

Are you in the right circles? (Days: 33 & 34)

Posted by A Dose of Justice

DAY 33: Here I am working on my circle skills. This is not trickery courtesy of my mommy. That is my handiwork people.

No school on Tuesday cause the grownups around here had to use the schools to do something called voting. They had to go fill in someone else’s circles. Mommy and Daddy must have been embarrassed because they had to hid behind a curtain to do it. Then someone gave them a sticker when they were done. Sounds crazy to me.

I hide and do things. I don’t get stickers.

DAY 34: This was Wednesday. Today was picture day at my school. I don’t need to worry about my looks, so I decided to keep working on my circle skills.